A lot of parents have dreams for their kid.
Parents dreams that their kids will become a doctor or lawyer or… whatever. Something I’ve always noticed with parents who dream for their children is that a lot of the time, it consists of deciding their future for them. I know that we want what’s best for our kids and that’s the reason we do this but sometimes it prevents us from hearing our child’s own dreams.
I’ve done my best to let Owlet live the way she wants. Within reason, we have rules and boundaries, but for the most part, she’s allowed to express things the way she wants to. So if she’s mad I let her scream, if she’s sad she can cry. If she wants to try to climb the really tall tree in our backyard she can do that… even though she can’t really reach even the lowest branch, but that’s not the point. The point is that if she’s living the way she wants she’s also learning that her life is her own to plan for and to have dreams about.
If she wants to become a ballerina I’m going to let her.
We live in a world where you’re only worth something if you make money, it’s unfortunate, but that’s how it works. The awesome thing is that, while making money as a ballerina will be super hard it IS possible. With enough hard work and research, Owlet could indeed be a professional dancer, if that’s what she wanted. Same goes for any profession she chose, whether it be something artistic, or something more mainstream and accepted. Never will the words; “But that won’t make you any money,” cross my lips to her ears. I run a blog for chrissakes, do you know how many people told me I couldn’t make money this way? So, no, Owlet will be free to live out her own dreams, not mine.
I have a major mental thing with this, I’ll admit. For the entire time, living with my parents I was told that I HAD to go to college, I HAD to get a degree and I HAD to become this or that to, “make myself useful in this world”. Everyone always told me I’d make a good teacher, so, in the beginning, I tried to focus on becoming that. Then I realized with all the drama California has with their education system, I’d be fired in an instant for not doing things “the right way”. So I figured I’d try something else, and on and on the cycle went for about 6 years of stress, until I realized that it’s ok if I don’t go to college. Not going to college doesn’t equal unproductive. College is not for everyone, but I was always told it was. So the pushing of other people’s ideas and dreams for me, got in the way of me figuring out what dreams I had for myself. It’s only now, after 6 years of being in the wrong place, that I’m figuring out where I want to be and what I want to do.
I am of the very firm believe that if Owlet is given the freedom of deciding what she wants to do at this very young age she’ll grow up knowing that, while it’s good to listen to people and hear their opinions, she does not have to base her dreams on what other people say. She will know that whatever she wants to do, I will stand behind her. Whether it be college or gap year, teacher or ballerina, the choice is hers.